Friday, February 06, 2009
It Has Come To This
So there's this drug called Amitiza, used to treat severe chronic constipation. Most people don't need it; you put them on prunes or spinach and explain to them that they are supposed to eat five to seven fruits/vegetables per day and not per week, and they do fine.
But some people do need it. I have one patient who does. Today I had to call his insurance company to get the drug re-authorized, and this is what ensued:
Pharmacy Benefit Rep: "What is the frequency of the patient's bowel movements on the medication?"
PBR: "How often is he having bowel movements?"
Me: "He has not shared that information with me."
PBR: "We need to know that before I can authorize the Amitiza."
So now I have to call up my patient and ask him how frequently he, uh, goes. What a surreal conversation that's going to be.