Tuesday, March 04, 2003
Feet First: The Cheap Laughs Edition
Hey, I'm not proud.
Story Number One: The Mad Pizza Eater, or "I Told You Not to Give Me any Damn Anchovies!"
Courtesy of Yahoo, we have this:
Axeman Attacks Chef over Pizza
FRANKFURT (Reuters) - Unhappy with his pizza and not content with a refund, a man in Germany has gone after the chef with an axe.
Frankfurt police said the 57-year-old man was restrained by customers after he drew the axe from his coat and started swinging it at the cook.
"Apparently, the pizza didn't agree with him," said police spokesman Manfred Feist. "He wasn't a regular customer."
And then there's this:
Story Number Two: Brothel for Sex-starved Dogs
BERLIN (Reuters) - A German artist has applied for a license to open a brothel in Berlin for sexually frustrated dogs and says it will be the first of its kind anywhere.
Karl-Friedrich Lenze, 54, said he planned to charge dog owners $27 per half hour of happiness.
"If dogs can't get what they want, they get cranky -- just like people," Lenze told Reuters.
Who you callin' cranky?! You son of a... uh, never mind...
The establishment would offer patrons a variety of carefully vetted "employees" of both sexes, rooms for private encounters and even a "bar" where customers could sniff out their preferred partners.
Aren't there enough unwanted puppies in the world? What are they going to use, condoms or something?